and now you're taking her to every restaurant.

I seriously contemplated posting a picture of Jesus draped in the American flag and holding a rifle, but I was raised Catholic and I'm certain my dad would drive 120 miles to smack me across the back of my head for being a heretic.

Boyfriend and I are throwing a huge party this weekend, so we did what every other American does on the Fourth of July by going to WalMart.

I'm starting to have anxiety about social gatherings because I've gotten too lax with my food and exercise regimen. It started slowly: at first, I was spending fewer days at the gym thinking I could use a day off ("one day" turned into ten... oops); before I knew it, that mentality crept into my food choices ("SUUUUUURE I'll have 32 ounces of steak for dinner!"). I haven't gained any weight, but I also haven't lost any which is bad news because I am exactly 22 days away from my neuro appointment and I was hoping to have made more progress than this.

Shopping at Walmart is a dangerous thing and I prefer to avoid it if at all possible, but we stupidly put off our shopping for today not taking into consideration the fact that all our other grocery store options would be closed for the holiday. It was my own fault, and it really hurts my soul to have to admit that. The idea was that we would make burgers and brats and buffalo chicken dip, and have beer and vodka for drinks. Well, this sent me into a panic attack thinking of how absolutely horrible it would be for my health to spend an entire day eating nothing but that shit. I tried to convince boyfriend to consider turkey burgers, or to consider offering salad as a side instead of meat and cheese and fat buffalo chicken dip, but he's a man and men only want to grill and drink beer (it's in their DNA). My pleading won me small concessions: we split our burger/hot dog buns (half regular, half wheat), and he tossed out the burgers in favor of lean chicken breast, and NO SLICED CHEESE! He still insisted on the beer, but I picked up a 35 pack of bottled water with the idea that some of our friends would also want to hydrate with something other than alcohol. So yay for healthy cookouts!

I'm not feeling particularly patriotic today (probably due largely in part to the fact that I have to work today, and also from the brutal workout I suffered earlier at the gym), so here are some statistics to make you wonder why nobody gives a fuck about Canada.

Seriously, why doesn't anyone want to move to Canada?