behind the curtain in the pantomime.

Okay, so. I've been gone... I know this. Sue me? I had some family bullshit stuff to take care of. I got to spend the better part of the weekend chillin' with my parents' pups, in between wanting to punch faces heated conversations. Family is not really my favorite thing.

Since I had my beloved pups all weekend, I was limited in my ability to exercise. Don't get me wrong, Scrappy is the love of my life and everyone knows it. EVERYONE. Even my boyfriend, and he's okay with playing second fiddle. But having two bark happy pups in a small apartment where no pets are allowed is a recipe for disaster eviction. I couldn't leave them unattended, so I couldn't go to the gym. Sad story.

As soon as my parents took them off my hands, boyfriend and I were out the door on our way to the gym. We're settling into a new routine now that I'm officially a member of the University gym (ps I got my membership card yesterday!). I start out with a mile on the treadmill before moving on to the elliptical for twenty minutes. I hate going on the elliptical cold, but running first puts me at serious risk that I'll never get off the treadmill. I have some mad love for running right now. Our total gym time comes out to be around 35 minutes, which is all boyfriend can currently handle in his physical condition. If it were up to me I would not leave in under an hour, but the boy needs support and I'm happy to be there for him. 35 minutes of cardio just isn't enough for me, so while the man-friend drives back home I run the 1.3 miles of steady uphills all the way back to our apartment. This could quite possibly be the best idea ever.

A few things that I've learned about exercising since joining the gym:

• My insecurities about being overweight in a gym... totally unfounded. If anything, I think people are impressed that my jiggly ass can run for that long. Granted, I'm sweating puddles, but minor details... meh.
• Running outdoors is a bitch. I'm becoming re-accustomed to the pleasures of treadmill running and it's making me realize that running outside seriously sucks. That being said, I think I'm on my way to developing a knee injury and the only thing that could explain this problem is my new-found treadmill love.
• Running outdoors is a bitch (redux). I was running home today after the gym in 75 degree weather, sun shining on my very tan shoulders, and I hated it. It was so hot and I couldn't stop sweating. I had the genius idea to start bringing sunglasses with me on my runs, but that sucks too. And then... I passed a patch of something full of pollen (or anthrax maybe, who knows) and my throat swelled and my heart rate spiked from 145 to 174 and I felt like I was going to die. On principle, I kept running, but it was seriously unpleasant. Thankfully it only lasted about a minute, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to start a letter writing campaign to the city to petition to have that bush removed.
• Today's workout was especially rough, I don't think we gave our bodies enough time to rest and we were beat. Earlier today, I picked up a liter of coconut water on a whim and I was so thankful to find that in the fridge when I got home from the gym. I was feeling pretty shitty after that fight with the anthrax but 16 ounces of coconut water set me right. Boyfriend convinced me to skip out on buying these shoes in favor of a coconut water subscription from Amazon. I don't know how much of this is caused by my potassium-leeching medication (screw you, Lasix), but I imagine my doctor will be happy to hear of my new habit.

After our workout, boyfriend and I spent half an hour excitedly chatting about how awesome this complex is and how we both wished we could have stayed longer. But I reminded him that it's better to workout for shorter times more frequently than to have lengthy and sporadic workouts. I love the feeling after a run that I could have done just a little more because it makes me so excited for the next day. Pure love.

On an unrelated note, I didn't work today. This is important because I won't be working on Mondays at all this summer so I'll consistently have three-day weekends. On today's agenda: tending to my garden. My mom and my grandma had picked up a whole bunch of plants for me a while back that I had neglected until today. They were sad and droopy in their thin plastic planters, it was breaking my heart. After lunch, I set myself to creating a good soil mix, potting my new plans, freshening up my old plants, and cleaning the deck.

I was totally rocking the Bree Van De Kamp vibe, minus the whole uptight bitch thing.

I've been a fan of Desperate Housewives for years, but I gave up on the series when it went to that whole flash forward story line. Plus, I vexed the shit out of me that all the characters were these perfect monsters (except for Lynnette... she's just a hot mess) with perfect lives. I didn't understand how anyone could manage gardening, cooking, cleaning, exercising, grooming, child rearing, and multiple hobbies all in one day (I'm looking at you, Bree). It's all just... unimaginable. Actually, it turns out I was just very poor at managing my time. I could give you a rundown of my entire day, but you just wouldn't believe me. It was a perfect day.

So perfect, in fact, I wouldn't be surprised if someone punched me out of jealousy. It was THAT good.

PS - white button-up blouse plus black fitted capris might be my favorite outfit of all time. And I'm only saying this because I fit in my crisp white blouse for the first time in five years. And also because I look hella hot in a white blouse and black capris.